What's the Score Blogfest

Today’s blogfest is brought to us by Rosie Connolly @ East for Green Eyes and it is all about music! It's the “What’s the Score Blogfest” and for a music geek like me it was very necessary to do. The instrustions are simple “Post any number of songs, artists, composers, posers, who/whatever that you might want to include in the soundtrack to your WIP.” Done!

My WIP Born for This is a futuristic fantasy/ dystopia (for lack of a better word) aimed at the “New Adult” demographic (ages 17-27 ish) And like I said in my last post I love to write to music, I love finding music that fits my themes and every so often I find a song that fits a character or event so completely perfectly I can hardly stand it. And those are the songs I will be talking about today. 

And first and foremost is a song by Katy Perry called “What Am I Living For?”. This song IS my MC Calista (you can get the down low on my characters here) Now there are a million reasons I love this song but mostly I think Katy cheated. After all the first line of the song is “I can feel a phoenix inside of me” And my MC does have a phoenix inside of her (think totem animal) and is represented by fire and when I first heard this song she instantly had my attention. But it is not only that lyric that applies to Calista, it is every lyric. This song is the musical version of her story.  But this song goes beyond just lyrics to relate to my character, it is the tone of the song, this is not the Katy Perry we are used to, and this song is not a pop song. It is deep and dark but also has a feeling of hope.

Take a listen here 

The next song is “The Drumming Song” by Florence and the Machine and is about my other MC, Tullio, who is Calista’s antagonist for most of the book (have you seen the Avatar the Last Airbender cartoon? Think Zuko’s story line) and this song is pretty much what happens to him every time he is around Calista. And it’s not really a love thing, it’s an energy thing. They are drawn together because of what they are and for Tullio (represented by water) especially he has a hard time dealing with her, she clouds his mind and spins him around, she is the hot to his cold and he has a hard time dealing.  And he spends most of the book trying to clear his head of her.

Take a listen here

Ok, I’ll admit it. My book has a little bit of a “love triangle” (actually it would be more of a love square, or a weird star. Since in the end all 4 of my ensemble all love each other in different ways.) But the song "Breath Again" by Sara Bareilles embodies the connection between Celest and Calista. They have a quick and fast connection in the book but Calista at this point in her journey cannot settle for what is easy, or what she needs. And Celest knows this and does not hold it against her and basically tells her “I love you, but you need to figure your shit out before I can even begin to be there for you. But once you do, call me.”  And this song is about knowing who it is that you need but not being able to choose them just yet but hoping that someday you will be able to be with them. And while Calista is represented by fire, Celest is represented by air/wind so in that way this song relates on an even deeper level. 

Take a listen here

And for the other half of my MC’s love triangle, the Calista/Tullio side, who have an amazing energy together but just ultimately destroy each other “Love the Way You Lie” by  Eminem featuring Rihanna is the perfect song for them. Because this song is not about blame, it is about both people knowing they are poison for the other person but also to being able to let go of them.  And about half the time I am rooting for Tullio and Calista to work out this song reminds me why they never will. (also i think the video is amazing)

Take a listen here

So that is that. Ultimately I am still looking for the perfect song for Evee and for Celest in their own right but I will know instantly when I find them. So in conclusion I will leave you with a song from Born for This’s companion book that is still untitled. This song is beautiful, but hauntingly so in reflection of what it means in context of the book. This song is for Agalia who is a woman represented by light, and this song in the back drop to her death right after her lover tells her not to worry and they will be able to save her, she kills herself as the only way to save them. “The Light” by Sara Bareilles.

Take a listen here

Anyway, I love music and I hope you all had fun looking at my choices ^.^

The Now Starring... Blogfest!!!

FINALLY! It is here! The Now Starring... Blogfest! I’m so excited to show you my cast and to get to see all of your casts and get to know your characters better through the actors you chose!

For me, because I don’t draw, casting has always been an important part of writing for me. Because I need to be able to picture my characters as people, I never use the actor as my muse or write the character just for an actor. I just find that being able to visually have a physical body to attach to my characters helps me see how they move and act better. I think it is the director in me. If I could draw them, that would be awesome then I could just draw how they look, but unfortunately I cannot. So without much further ado, the cast for my WIP Born For This.

Small note, the drawing of my characters where part of an x-mas gift from the lovely Lindz who is helping me host this Blogfest, she gave me the line work and I half assed colored them in Photoshop just for you, I also Photoshoped the some of the actors badly to look a little more like some of the characters! Also Lindz made the table for me.

Click it! It gets bigger!(and readable!)

Anyways I hope you all had a lot of fun getting to know my characters a little better! Now I am off to look at all of yours! Also don’t forget to check back and see who the winners are of the box of Magnetic Poetry for Book Lovers, and a thing you can scribble on in the shower!

Fear and writing in Colorado

Ok, Colorado doesn’t really have anything to do with this, I’m just being silly.

But seriously, writing scares me. Maybe not so much the writing, but what the writing means. Bearing my soul? That some scary stuff right there! But then it’s the little things too, what if it sucks? What if I write myself into a corner and I cannot get out of it? What if I spend all this time and energy and then I never get published? What if I do get published but everyone hates it? What if I end up hating it?

The original idea for my story is 12 years old, it was an idea a friend of mine and I came up with to write together after I moved from California to Colorado as a creative way for us to keep in touch even if we didn’t have anything to talk about. 2 years ago I decided that the bones of the story where good and I began the process of remolding it, striping it down to bare bones and then re building. It was a long process; there was a LOT of crap in there and stuff that we just ripped off of movies and books that we liked because it was just for us, no one was ever going to see it. And now I have what I feel like is a solid story, with solid characters but I still can’t make myself write. Its fear that stays my pen, that has me questioning myself so entirely. But I think admitting you have a problem is the first step to making it better.

So I am taking this time to take a stand. I will not let this fear rule me. It’s a silly thing to let decide something so important. So I’m not going to take it anymore. I’m going to write my book. And that is that! Sure, I’m still unsure but I will never know unless I try. So I have to try.

How you ever questioned yourself like I have? Ever have doubts? Then I encourage to to take a stand with me, to look fear in the eye and not back down. Because this is your story and it damn well deserves to be told!

~~~~~

Be sure to check out the Now Staring...Blogfest I'm hosting with my platonic-life-mate, Lindz. There are a couple of fun prizes, and it should be a lot of fun!

You are what you read.

Every published author’s blog/journal/website I have ever read usually has an FAQ, and on that FAQ is usually the question “Do you have any advice for aspiring authors?” and I swear on everyone the answer is “read”. Read what you like, read what you don’t like, read in the genre you want to get published in, read stuff completely different from your own, it doesn’t really matter what just read, read, read! and as an avid reader ( as one who reads about 50 books a year, more if I have a lot of free time and don’t want to socialize) and aspiring author I completely agree. I believe books can change lives, but they can also change your writing.

I was not always into reading; actually it was something I kind of avoided. I didn’t used to think books could be that engaging or entertaining. My friends would wax poetic about books we were assigned for class/books they picked up. And I just didn’t care. I found nothing special about ‘To Kill a Mockingbird’ or whatever we had to read that month. Sure I had read a read a few things that I liked and I was reading Harry Potter with all of my friends, but that didn’t even click with me till number 4. But I never LOVED a book. But I can pin point the book that changed my life, I know without a doubt that without this one book I would have never become obsessed with writing or reading for that matter. And thinking about that book made me want to write this post. Not to tell you every book I have ever read that changed my life but to pick out the special ones and talk not only about how they changed my life but also how they changed my writing. In order, the 4 most influential books in my life so far.

1: Tithe by Holly Black (2002)

What it did for me:

I can remember the day I found this book so perfectly. My parents were on the cusp of getting a divorce (that happened a year later) I was spending some time with my dad and he took me to the library and told me to pick out two books to read. I was not thrilled about the idea, but I figured worse comes to worse I don’t read them and I return them. Whatever. (I was a surly and jaded 16, perhaps why I liked Kaye so much now that I think about it.)And Tithe was on display, in the new release section or the staff recommendation section, and it glared at me. Actually I hated the cover. I thought it was hideous. And I made a point of not picking it up. Yes I thought the original cover that ugly (the paperback cover was beautiful however, and even the new paperback covers are not horrid). But it kept staring at me. Like it knew something I didn’t.

Finally my time was running out and I had yet to find a second book. So despite myself I picked up Tithe and read the synopsis.  Still not sold I put it down. Wondered around. Came back to it. Left it again. Came back. Finally my dad came and found me and said we had to go, so I grabbed it just to make him happy. I didn’t want him to think his efforts wasted or me ungrateful.

And to make a long story short, I read it eventually and I was in love. A love so deep and powerful my dad literally had to rip the book from my hands so he could return it (ironically, I still have the library copy of the other book I picked up that day, Sirena by  Donna Jo Napoli). Never before had a book spoken to me so deeply, seemed so real. It was not a book that pretended everything was ok, no the world is a messed up place and just because you are the MC does not mean that you are free from pain. Bad things happen to everyone and there is no way to hide from them, but if you are strong you can weather the bad stuff and come out stronger on the other side.  The good are not always good just cuz they are supposed to be and the bad are not always bad; there is a lot of gray in the world. And that is how my life felt right then. I will always love Holly Black for this book and changing my life. She opened a door I had closed, and over the next few years I would need a lot of books to make it through the shit storm that became my life.

What it did for my writing:

The truth hurts, the real world sucks, but you can still find beauty in it. Holly Black taught me that in my own writing I don’t have to pull punches. I can tell the nitty gritty truth and it can be beautiful. Also it taught me that I can set a fantasy book in the real world, that I don’t have to invent someplace magical for magic to happen because it is happening all around me all the time.  Also characters go through the same things that I do, they feel the same things I feel, they can be real people. That they NEED to be real in order to matter.

2: Harry Potter by J.K. Rowling (2002+)

What it did for me:

Ok like most people HP changed my life, I became obsessed, a crazy fan girl, it was something for me and my friends to bond over. Sure I eventually grew disenchanted with the whole thing but I can still respect that HP became a great escape for me and I will be ever grateful for that.

What it did for my writing:

You could ask anyone of my high school friends, I hated Harry Potter the character. I hated him. I loved the adult characters and I loved the world. But for any of the main cast I could care less. I didn’t like their characters, but I loved their world. The world is want drew me in JKR did an amazing job of creating a wonderful world that I could get lost in. and in fact I did. I began to RP in the Harry potter world. Lisa Turpin, Pansy Parkinson, Theodore Nott, I loved exploring characters that did not really make into the books for any extended period of time, I loved being able to create characters that already had a defined world. I met an amazing writing partner through HP RP, and to this day we still write together, though now we write original stuff together. And without HP I would have never have found  my love for writing again.

3: The Songs of the Lioness by Tamora Pierce (2003)

What it did for me: 

ok, just to say that just SotL changed my life would be a little bit of a lie, it was all of her Tortall books that did it for me. But started with SotL, and to this day SotL is still my favorite. I was sort of strong armed into reading this by one of my oldest friends and I am forever grateful. I just loved Alanna, and could relate to her (as a redhead with a short temper who hates bugs and cold, I mean come on!) but what I loved most was he struggle. Nothing was ever given to her and she had to work for her dream. I liked that. It seemed to me that to often MC’s just seemed to be able to do things, born with gifts that they just knew how to wield to win the prize. Even her magic she had to work at. But she also had great friends to support her and I think in a way Tamora taught me to have friends and to be a good friend. 

What it did for my writing:

If there is one thing I think Tamora knows it is Tortall, her world, and her books taught me the importance of knowing your world, knowing the laws and govern the people and the land.  She also taught me the importance of character relationships, and that characters need people they can lean on sometimes or at least people to offer to help even if the MC won’t accept it. She also taught me the importance of names, especially pet/animal names.  And that bad names can break a book. I love you Tamora, I would consider you my favorite author but I cannot stand how you name animals. Your character names are fine, but ever animal seems to have been named by a 5 year old girl and it kind of drives me insane.

4: A Great and Terrible Beauty by Libba Bray (2005)

What it did for me:  

 I am sure this book saved my life.  And I do not say that lightly, I was in a very dark place when I read this book.  And there where so many quotes from this book that I could have sworn were written just for me. Something about Victorian girls trapped by society norms but longing for more, longing for magic, longing to be free touched me. But when I was depressed, on the verge of doing something drastic it was Libba words that spoke to me, that stayed my hand.

“But forgiveness... I'll hold on to that fragile slice of hope and keep it close, remembering that in each of us lie good and bad, light and dark, art and pain, choice and regret, cruelty and sacrifice. We're each of us our own chiaroscuro, our own bit of illusion fighting to emerge into something solid, something real. We've got to forgive ourselves that. I must remember to forgive myself. Because there is an awful lot of gray to work with. And no one can live in the light all the time.
The wind shifts, bringing with it the smell of roses, strong and sweet. Across the ravine, I see her in the dry crackle of leaves. A deer. She spies me and bolts through the trees. I run after her, not really giving chase. I'm running because I can, because I must.
Because I want to see how far I can go before I have to stop.”

What it did for my writing:

It taught me that words can be beautiful. That words can change lives and speak to the soul. That you need to take care with your words for they can make or break you.  They can make or break your audience.

And that is not to say that only these 4 books have changed my life or my writing (really I could list about 30 books but that seemed a little long for this post) but these are the 4 that had the deepest impact in both areas.

What books have changed your life?  What books have changed your writing?

Awesomeness

Ok so last time I talked about flaws, this time I want to talk about something a little more uplifting. Awesomeness! I’m awesome, you are awesome, let’s have an awesome party! I want to know what you excel at when you put pen to paper (or fingers to keyboard, I think I’m the only one around who still puts pen to paper)? What do you write that just makes you want to writer more? Fight scenes? Villains? Does your voice just rock socks off? And I’m not telling you to tell me what *other* people tell you  that you are good at, I want to know what *you* think you are good at. Because I know you think you are amazing at something and I want to know what! What sets you apart?

Here is what I think I rock at.

Characters

Yeah, my characters bring all the boys to the yard and their like “They are better than ours!” damn right they are better than yours! I could teach you but I’d have to charge!

Ok silliness aside, I do think my characters rock. I have an ensembles cast, that have very little contact with people who are not of their group so I think it is very important to have very solid characters. Not to mention that most of my plot is character driven, they really kind of stumble on to the “real” plot by mistake. So yeah they rock, every single one of them. I feel that they are extremely real, and each one of them a little broken. They each have a different voice and motivations that to me are completely real and relatable, I don’t even think of my ‘bad guys’ as bad, they just have different world views then the ‘heroes’. And I pride myself on that. They are real people with favorite foods, colors, locations, books (for those who read), and they deserve to have their story told. So I work on my WIP for them mostly.

World

If I’m going to have bitchen characters then I fell it seems only fitting that I have a bitchen place for them to run around in. I think I have crafted a totally plausible dystopia, and I know they rules and laws of this land better than the rules and laws of the one I live in (hahaha, no seriously… its true) and I feel like I have woven my fantasy elements into it pretty damn seamlessly I feel.

Sure there are lots of things that I feel like I’m good at, or could be good at with a little more work. But those are the two things that I think set me apart. Sure I could be totally wrong, but I doubt that that is very likely.

Flaws

As my favorite TV personality, Tim Gunn, often says “Make it work.” It’s become a sort of mantra for me as a writer. Obviously as any aspiring author I think I have something to give to the world. I think to want to be a writer there is a certain amount of self-love that must be involved before you can jump from just writing for yourself and deciding “The world has to read my thoughts! I’m amazing!” (Like wise with Blogging too I feel.) But even the best writers have thing they struggle with, things that they turn to their support group for. And that’s what I want to know, what are your flaws? When do you have your “Make it Work” moment?

I’ll make it easy, I’ll go first.

Spelling/Grammar

I know right? An aspiring author who counts spelling and grammar among her biggest flaws? Why not just give up now? Well let me tell you it’s something I struggle with every day, and for a long time kept me from even wanting to attempt sharing my story with the world. This is one thing I can point to and know with out of doubt in my mind that bad schooling led to this. I don’t know what it was but I could never spell. Each week we had a new list of words we had to learn and at the end of the week we had a spelling test, and I would write out the words (what felt like) hundreds of times, be quizzed by my parents, nothing helped. And I remember ever so clearly my teacher passing back yet another test I did poorly on and patting me on the shoulder as I held back tears (failing never suited me well) and telling me “Don’t worry, it’s not the end of the world, now they have computer that fix that sort of thing for you.” And went on her merry way. But in my 8-9 year old mind it was like a cloud had been lifted, there where blue sky’s ahead! I never had a thought to work at it ever again, and somehow the teachers in my life just let it slide and it wasn’t until late in high school when I figured out how much I was held back by my self-made handicap.

But I think knowing the problem is half the battle. I know that when I finish my WIP that I will have to have some very patient friends comb over it and help me out before I send off my quarry letters.

Dialog

Now I can speak at length in real life, I can hold hours of conversation without blinking an eye. Why is it so hard for me to make my characters talk to each other? Hell even their inner monologues are fine, but their outer ones? They always feel flat to me. Cheesy.  Very much:

“I like cheese.”

“Cheese is good.”

“Yeah.”

“Swiss is my favorite.”

I mean what the hell? My characters can think coherent thoughts but the moment the words need to come out of their mouths? Nothing.  It is super frustrating.  But luckily I have my writer’s night girls who help me through the major kinks.

I have a few other minor ones (like fight scenes, how in the hell am I supposed to make my MC move naturally? Why can't I just have her punch everyone in the face and light everyone on fire and win? If I got punched in the face and lit on fire I would just give up.) but those are the big two. The two that I truly have to put my nose to the grind stone and not matter what just “make it work.” Because if I want to be published then I have no other choice.

Simply Hot Mugshot Blogfest

I’ve never done a blog-fest before, so I hope I do this right *crosses fingers*. I want to become a part of a community here on blogger and this seems like a good way to get around and meet people. A friend of mine did this one, and like her coffee is my life force so it seemed like a good way to dive into the world.

I love coffee, tea, hot cocoa, really as long as it is steaming and in a glass I will drink it… that sounded a little like a challenge. Lets just make sure nothing gross makes its way into my mug.  Now I own over 30 mugs (yes I know I have a problem, let me direct you to my last post to see a real problem) so narrowing it down to one mug is near impossible!

Do I pick the mug that fits the best in my hand? May favorite coffee mug that always seems to hold the perfect amount of coffee and keep it hot? My favorite cocoa me? My tea mug? The one I painted myself? The one that is my favorite color? The one that’s snarky and crass? The one I got on my surprise birthday trip my dad sent me on to NYC? Can I post the one I painted and feel like I’m not copying my friend Lindz?

As you can see I had a lot of things to ask myself before I could pick something to show you all.

I hemmed and hawed most of the day over it. But then I finally decided. It has to be my fire mug.

I painted this mug at the same time Lindz painted hers; it was such a great time just sitting at the table in this little shop chatting about life while listing to weird x-mas music that we really wanted to turn off. This mug is the representation of the MC from my WIP. Each of my main characters is tied to an element and (I hope) obviously you can tell my MC is fire. The quote on the mug is a quote that pretty much sums up my character (I have picked out famous quotes for all of them) and has become the working title of my story. And besides the personal reasons for loving this mug I also love the shape of this mug, I live mugs to be curvy like women, they fit so nicely in my hand that way. And while this mug is big, it is perfect if I only fill it 75% full and then I get all of the drink I need and don’t feel like I’m going to spill all over during the first few sips.

Also there is a little surprise on the bottom of the mug that just makes me giggle in the way it to pertains to my MC. Also I painstakingly painted the inside as well, so I would have something pretty to look at as I drank.